Sunday, February 18, 2007

R.I.P.

Last week I killed a mouse. I haven't told many people about this since I'm struggling with guilt, shame and confusion. The mouse was stuck to a gluetrap behind the fridge, still moving, so I decided to put the trap and mouse in a plastic bag, put the bag on the floor in the hallway outside, and wack it really hard with the wooden part of a broom - blunt-force trauma. It's my first kill ever.

I have killed bugs before, of course, but that doesn't count because bugs are not real animals, they're bugs. There's also a sense of satisfaction after you kill a bug (which is not the case after a mouse-kill), as if you did something good for humanity. "Great job, I'm impressed," my friend Amy usually says when I triumphantly call her to tell her I squashed another little bastard with the yellow pages.

A mouse, however, is an animal. It has a family and a social network. If I tell people I killed a mouse, most likely they will say "eeeeeewwww" or "oh-my-Goood" or "nooo waaaaay" which will put me in a guilt-ridden defensive mode, having to justify my deed with lengthy explanations. And even if people tend to agree that the mouse had to die (sure, it's better to kill it than to let it die slowly) inside they're still thinking "eeeeeew" and they'll never look at you the same way again. I'm a killer.

7 comments:

Unknown said...

I can't believe it!!!?? Not the fact that you killed a mouse, rather that YOU didn't die when you saw the mouse... I would have... I'm REALLY impressed...

Jen said...

You did what you had to do. It was either him or you... and you are bigger!!

Nikomediz said...

The first kill is never really the last...Happy Hunting!

sarah said...

NOOOOOOO WAAAAAAAAAY!
btw, i created a google account for the sole purpose of commenting on your blog.

Schliecker said...

Look... Does a cat feel guilt? I rest my case.

Julie Link said...

Although late, I would like to comment. I once flushed a mouse in Jersey and I didn't feel bad about it all. I mean, he took the plunge and I just helped him finish the job. You shouldn't feel bad...they can clone mice now so chances are he doesn't know he's gone.

jinwonlim said...

i did that a couple of times... putting a glue trapped mouse in a plastic bag. i just threw it in a garbage can. it probably suffered slower death. your way is probably more humane. btw, my dad once killed the escaped hamster from upstairs b/c he thought it was a mouse.